we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
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