Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
