What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Four minutes until I can fart!
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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