You made me cry and you don't even care
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
