After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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