You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
