i think my tv is drunk
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
