are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
