Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
