Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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