I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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