You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
