At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
