fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
