have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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