It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
