i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
