Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
you inspire me to be a worse person
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
