Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
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