Me too!
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
