ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
