My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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