Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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