I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
this just has baby written all over it
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
