Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
