Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
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