It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
