I don't remember. Are we still dating?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
