saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
