I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
