Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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