i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
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