You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
