dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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