I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize