real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
