you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
