so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
How does it feel to date your dad?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
