your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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