would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Randomize
