Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
How does it feel to date your dad?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
