No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
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