Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
