He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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