sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
