Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Randomize
