Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
COCAINE IS GR8
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
