walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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