There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
