found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
