my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
